If you’re reading this, you’ve made in into the 12th month of 2020. I initially took a break from blogging and YouTube in November and I was set to start again in January of 2021. The main reason I wanted to take a long break was because I was feeling under pressure and my creativity stopped flowing. I felt that my last couple of posts were written for the sake of writing something because I wanted to prove to God that he can trust me with little. I’m very intentional about what I put out and my main goal is to make an impact and help other people and encourage them.
As I took a break, ideas started flowing again and I was so tempted to put out content but I knew that my cup was empty and I had nothing to pour out that would be beneficial. I needed to go back to the drawing board and remind myself why I started and where we trying to go with this. See, as terrifying as starting is, along the way it’s just as scary. I remember being so neverous in April when I started this blog because I had no idea what I was going to say after my first post but God has been faithful and has been whispering to me, what I should say and what I should put out. This platform has allowed me to be open, truthful and vulnerable. It’s one thing to go through life experiences, but it’s something else to experience life and have to share it with the world. I had no clue what was going to come out of this journey but we are here now, with over 400 views and the most important thing is we gave people hope and we made a difference in someone’s life.
I just wanted to take a moment to thank you all, for taking this journey with me and for believing in me. Thank you for reading and sharing my posts. I really appreciate it.
Now back to business.
I was reading ‘The crushing’ by T. D Jakes, earlier and I came across a scripture where Jesus was talking to his disciples. And here’s what he had to say :
I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have [perfect] peace. In the world you have tribulation and distress and suffering, but be courageous [be confident, be undaunted, be filled with joy]; I have overcome the world.” [My conquest is accomplished, My victory abiding.]
John 16:33 AMP
The reason this stood out for me, was because 2020 was a hard year filled with pain and suffering. This year I was in a season of constant pain and storm after storm. Its been raining non stop. I’ve cried more times than I have my whole life. I’ve been tested and thrown into the fire. I’ve fallen apart and broke down more times than I can remember. I remember this one particular time where I came back from an old friend’s birthday party. The whole night I had to hold up a smile and pretend that everything was OK, meanwhile I was dying on the inside. When I got home, I closed my bedroom door and I fell to the ground and I couldn’t stop crying. I was gasping for air. I tried to kneel and pray and I only had strength to sit there and cry to God.
As you all know, I’ve been diagnosed with major depression and anxiety disorder and a mood disorder. I’ve kept this a secret from my family and friends for the longest time and blogging has allowed me to open up about it and speak up and stand up for those who are too afraid to say anything. I’ve been on my journey to healing but it hasn’t been easy. Not all days are the same. This has affected me in so many ways but stay tuned because we’re still going to unlock the hidden truths of mental illness when we get back.
In this scripture, Jesus warns us about the days to come. And what we should expect here in this world. He points out there will come a time where you will experience pain, tribulation and suffering (Read the whole chapter for context). But he says that in him we have perfect peace. This means that when our life is in Christ, in him we will find peace even when we’re going through times of trouble and suffering. This serves as a reminder that we need to come to Jesus when the world is on our shoulders and we will experience peace. These painful moments are going to happen around you but on the inside is where you will find peace. We are so blessed that Jesus overcame the world and paid the price. We now belong to the kingdom of heaven and this kingdom is what rules our lives. Not this world. We belong to Jesus. This then led me to reflect back on 2020 and see this as a lesson. This is just the beginning. It is not over yet.
Here’s a list of things I’ve learned in 2020 :
- Healing is not a straight line, there will be ups and downs and just because you have bad days, doesn’t mean God hasn’t healed you.
- Pain is a part of life and something we should expect to go through as Christians but this does not mean the absence of God in our lives.
- Growth comes from the painful moment in our lives. It’s our duty to shift our perspective and use those moments as an opportunity to learn God’s will, character and be close to him.
- God knows what you need when you need it. It’s important to pray and communicate to God what it is that you need. He will send people in your life to help you.
- Things don’t always work out as planned. Even if it’s frustrating, know that God loves you.
- You need to step back once in a while and let God lead you. It’s important to give him room to be God in your life.
- Honesty and vulnerability are the key to your healing. I believe that God can’t heal what you pretend to be. Be real and feel free to be open with God. Be yourself and don’t hold back.
- God values rest as much as hard work. It’s important to navigate and honour the season you’re in. Ask God, accept, surrender to God in whatever season.
- Prayer is important. We are not fighting a physical battle and it’s important to pray in the spirit because of what’s happening in the spirit realm.
- The enemy will definetly come and tempt you in the areas of your weakness and he will attack you and that’s why it’s important to pray and read the word because the word is your sword and weapon to fight the enemy’s lies. You defeat a lie with the truth.
- The truth will set you free.
- God will always send a word to encourage you and give you hope. He never leaves you dry.
- Live for yourself and not anyone else. Don’t live to impress people but always strive to do God’s will no matter how uncomfortable it is. Not everyone around you will get it and it’s bound to put your relationships to the test. This might threaten your relationships with the people that are very close to you but be willing to give it all up for Jesus. Everything comes at a cost.
- Faith is not logic. Faith often looks like foolishness and failure in the eyes of people but to God you are victorious.
- A vision is very important and will keep you on track but always leave room for things to change. Don’t be fixed on things happening one way.
- Focus on developing your spiritual gifts and character and leave the rest to God.
- God is faithful no matter what season you’re in. Keep declaring it even when you don’t feel it or see it in your circumstances.
- Keep believing in the word of God. read and meditate on the word daily.
- Know who you are do not try be like anyone else. Be yourself.
- Trust God and don’t let what’s on the outside determine what’s on the inside. Don’t let the outside voices kill what God put inside of you.
- Our responsibility is to love God with all our heart, mind and soul. God will do what any loving father would do. He will protect, provide, fight and take care of you. He loves us so much.
- You’re stronger than you think you are. You’re going to make it. Have faith.
- God is good and he is rich in mercy. He’s not out there tying to get us for our wrongs. He is forgiving and is a God of second chances.
- This isn’t the end. It’s only the beginning